Are You Actually Growing – Or Just Getting Older? - The Morning Gear — Nigeria's Self Improvement and Mindset Podcast for GenZ

I sat in the room and asked myself a question. Did I actually grow this year or did I just survive it? And the answer surprised me, and I think it would surprise you. So I was depressed. Like I was depressed because I remember that a few months ago I actually said the goal of hitting 1,000,000 sales of my ebook before the 5th of May, which is my birthday. I'm looking at the obvious results of that, you know, public announcement. I had not even made-up to like 10,000 from that product, as many as that sounds.

Probably I was like colleagues under the influence of doing Kruger's effect. I saw someone who is selling the same thing, how to write an ad, which is an AI. He's selling his his book for 40,000 naira. Yes, 40,000 Naira. And I remembered that August 24th last year when I was 18 actually launched this podcast with my phone. I said, OK, let me go and check my statistics, my analytics, right? And I went to my broadcast analytics and voila, the broadcast has listeners in 19 countries already. Growth, the kind of actually changed who you are.

It requires a decision every single time. For me, this is the exact reason why I didn't make the 1,000,000 naira I proposed I was going to make. Neurological research shows that the prefrontal cortex, which is the identity development center of your brain, is not fully developed until you turn around 25 years. Being broke is the best place you can find yourself. Comfort heals faster than anything. Getting older is automatic. Growing is a decision, and the difference between the two is whether you are asking the five questions or just watching the calendar move.

And I just give you what's the right questions. If you're here right now, you already know something most people your age don't, that the conversation inside your head matters, that who you are becoming is more important than what you are achieving, and that the right words at the right time can change everything. By listening to the morning gear, I am divine. Danielle, the Gen. Z educator, welcome back. If you've been here before and if you're new here, you're right on time. I need three things from you before we start One, subscribe or follow YouTube, Spotify, Apple podcast wherever you're listening.

Every subscription tells the algorithm that this podcast deserves to reach more people and there are people in Nigeria, in Africa, across the world who needs this conversation. Help me get it to them. Two like this episode 5 star rating on Spotify or Apple podcast like button on YouTube. It costs you nothing but it means everything to me. 3 drop a comment anyway. Tell me where you're listening from. Tell me what you are going through right now. This isn't a broadcast, it's a conversation, and I actually read what you write.

The morning here is currently held in 19 countries, and it grows because people like you decide it's worth sharing. I am glad you are here, and I look forward to having you here over and over and over again. Now let's get into it. Do you know that growing and getting older are two different things? Most people think growing is automatic as getting older is automatic, but it's not. We get older every year, but unfortunately most of us don't grow every year. I believe by the end of this episode you'll be able to know exactly the difference between growing and just getting older.

I turned 19 a few years ago and a week before that I sat in a room and asked myself a question. Did I actually grow this year or did I just survive it? And the answer surprised me and I think it would surprise you as well. On that fatal afternoon I was doomed scrolling on Instagram watching the reels and all that. I sat on the bed and while I was dim scrolling my battery went down and since there was light I decided to go charge my phone B4 and the pad doesn't stain now I've heard when to charge my phone.

I came back to the room, I sat on the bed and I stared outside the window and then I had to like sit with myself, sit with my emotions, sit with my feelings and all that because that do scrolling was a withdrawal method. Yes, was a withdrawal response, right? I was trying to withdraw from the actual emotions I was feeling at that point. But then as my phone went down and I sat on the bed, I had to sit with myself. So like I said I took 19 a few weeks ago on the 5th of May and that week before that 1000 this happened.

So after plugging my phone, I sat on the bed and looking out the window had to start recording. I was depressed like I was depressed within the week. I have been depressed within that week. I have been depressed frequently. I wanted to leave the house probably because OK, I was always at home because I'm very introverted. I really go out except it needs I need to rather. So I was sitting that day on the bed and I started to think I told 19 in a few days I what have I actually achieved? Did I actually grow?

And that is why I'm bringing this episode to you now. Because my phone was low, I was forced to stop screaming and I had to sit on the bed and sit with myself. Right now I'm thinking I have to like check the calendar to know exactly how how many days it was to my birthday was like 5 days to my birthday. No, I started to recall what did I actually do? What have I actually achieved? Because I remember that a few months ago I actually set a goal of hitting 1,000,000 in sales of my ebook before the 5th of May, which is my birthday.

And looking at the obvious results of that, you know, public announcement, I had not even made-up to like 10,000 from that product, as funny as that sounds now that alone was enough for me to be depressed because I had come out publicly to see I'm going to make a millionaire and all that. Probably I was, well, I call it under the influence of doing Kruger's effect, which means people who are less competent feel like they are competent because they don't really know what it takes to achieve what they want to achieve.

Then people who are actually more competent and know what it takes confident because they actually knew the work they have to put into it to achieve what they want to achieve. Something like that. In my scenario, that was the definition of what doing Kuga effect was or is now that Elon got me depressed. I was sitting. I was just trying to, you know, channel that feeling to something else. But then within that moment of self judgment and self sabotaging, I had to come back. I had to come back now.

That is why I decided to make this episode the difference between growing and getting older. So while thinking about it, I started to think what exactly what exactly was the reason why I did not make my or I did not hit my goal of making 1,000,000 in 72 days. Now previously, because I'm recording this broadcast like a few weeks after that. On that day, I thought that the reason was because I did not have the resources right in the sense that I did not have the money per SE. No, I did not manage properly the money I had, but I'm thinking about it now.

I actually don't have any excuse because now at this state of I am now, I saw that that was not actually the actual reason, but I'm going to tell you the actual reason within the episode, right? I'm going to review to you the actual reason why I did not make that 1,000,000. And I will tell you that this is something that most people do not really admit, but it's mostly because of our problems as young people who are trying to become great people, successful and all that. Getting older happens to you.

Getting older, it happens to you. You don't have a choice. As the year goes, years turns to decade, decades turns to centuries, you get older, you don't have a choice. But growing, growing happens because of you. Your body adds a year whether you earned it or not. But growth, the kind of actually change who you are, it requires a decision every single. Now here's the problem. We've been taught to measure our growth by our outcomes. Did you hit that goal? Did you make that money? Did you hit that follower account?

Did you get the results? But then we forget to understand that outcomes are just lagging indicators of our lives. They tell you what happened last season. That is the outcomes. The outcome tells you what happened last season, but they did not tell you who you became because of what happened last season. So while I was thinking about everything, how my life was a misery and all that, because I felt like what have I achieved? But as a very mindful, unconscious person that I am, I have to think about my thoughts in a different light.

Now when we see that growth, it should be measured by who you became. As soon as you ask myself who did I actually become, I started to remeasure my growth. Now a lot of things happened within that month. When I wrote my book, I stopped my my toxic boss and I actually had a plan and actually executed that plan successfully. That is growth. And I remembered that August 24th last year when I was 18 actually launched this podcast with my phone. Now last year December, it was heading like 11 countries right now.

When I was thinking, I said, OK, well, let me go and check because my podcast has been on hiatus for quite a while now and I said OK, let me go and check my statistics, my analytics, right? I went to my podcast analytics and voila, the podcast has listeners in 19 countries already. A lot of circumstances would have let me not achieve that last year, but I still have that plan. I still executed it and I can still see the result of that action. I actually grew I did not just survive, I grew. In fact, I told a lot of people that if you told me last year, the before when I was 17, that by 18 I'll have a podcast which should be heard in 19 countries currently, I would not have believed you because he was never in my plan.

But within the year I had that vision and I was able to execute it. I had the plan late last year December. I was able to write my e-book and I published it on my own. So I executed that plan. Now I'm not just the podcast host. I am an auto, as funny as that sounds. I am an author, which means what I grew. I did not just survive it, I grew. I did something that I have never done before. I'm not trying to market myself or patronize myself, but the quality of my book, you would not find that anywhere for that price.

I saw someone who is selling the same thing, how to write an e-book using AI. He's selling his book for 40,000 naira. Yes, 40,000 naira. And mine is just how much. And because I intentionally joined that class to say OK if you're saying the same thing, let me see how much value you're offering. I even saw the fact that I offered more value in terms of my explanation in the book, in terms of the bonus that came after buying the book. I offered more value than him. Yet he's selling his book for what, 40,000 naira.

That means I actually did achieve something now within the year like I stopped my job. But then I can confidently come out to tell you that I am a pro at CCTV installation anywhere. I am a pro even if you take me to the President's house now trained store CCTV, I will give him a very outstanding job yes and this happened when I was still worth 18. So the year did not just pass me by, actually grew. Now on the path where I came out to publicly say I was going to make one millionaire online, I was actually learning sales and marketing.

Currently, I have a lot of knowledge on sales, especially on digital marketing. So I'm actually growing. I did not just let the year pass me by. You see how I am preframing the whole narrative? Listen attentively, I said I was going to reveal what made me not make Tamilian rights. I'll still do that, just keep listening. Now within the year, I said to go for myself. That was I want to be able to speak in a physical event. So I did apply. I planned everything and I executed it and by God's grace, next week, hopefully next week, Thursday, I would be having the opportunity to speak at an event.

By God's grace, this is what we call growth. I did not just let the year pass me by, I actually grew with it. Did I hit the 1,000,000 goal? No, but I learned exactly specifically why I didn't. And that knowledge alone is worth more than the money would have been because the money would have been spent. But the lesson is in my head forever. So here's what I want to give you today. Not a goal setting exercise. Not a vision board prompt. I call it the growth audit. 3 questions. You can run on yourself on your birthday or run them when the year ends or run them when you need to know if you're actually drawing.

I called them the good audits and that's actually what I asked myself to be able to come to this conclusion that no, I did not just get older. In fact, I have achieved way more than the average 18 year old would achieve currently in Nigeria. Will I remind you to actually wrote JAM within all these? Actually wrote JAM after being off school for like 3 years. The marital was not like, you know, banging like that because I actually started preparation like 2 weeks before the exams. But then I did well is only because I'm applying to UNILAC.

That's why my I'm saying my result is fair. But if I was applying to other schools, then my result is more than enough to get me into my course of choice. So I did grow. So now we're going to look at the questions. Question one, who did you become this year? As I'm asking you now, ask yourself who did you become this year? Not what did you do? Who are you now that you weren't like 12 months ago? Can you answer that question for me? I became someone who ships. Who did I become? I become someone who is who is a doer.

I don't just plan, I execute my plans. There were days I had to like write plan for the day, plan for the week and I had to follow through and execute it. I did not just become someone who set the goal. I would not try to do something. So I'm not just someone who who, who plans, I execute. So that is who I became. I could call myself a digital entrepreneur. I could call myself a digital marketer. Who did you become this year? That is the question you need to ask yourself. Question 2. What did you learn that you can never unlearn?

What has this past few months taught you? What of this age taught you that you can never unlearn? What is that irreversible education? For me, this is the exact reason why I did not make the one millionaire I proposed I was going to make. Listen attentively, Yahoo your ears. Being broke is the best place you can find yourself. Take it from me, being broke is the best place you can find yourself. See, whenever I'm broke, my problem solving skills is activated. Like really really activated. I think of ways to achieve.

Probably when I was not broke, I was seeing that to achieve this, this goal or to solve this problem, there's only one way. But when I am broke, I'll see like 10 different ways I can use to solve this exact problem. So that is what this year has taught me. Bean Brook is a beautiful place to find yourself. In fact, it draws me closer to the world. I ain't gonna lie. I don't know if it's only me, bro. Bean Brook draws me closer to God. So this is that irreversible education. This year has taught me Bean Brook is the best place you can find yourself as someone who wants to make impact.

Because why I did not make my first two millionaire online before I turned 19 was because within that year, within that point or that period of time when I was writing my book, I was really broke. Within that time, I made that. That video was really broke. So I saw the vision and I knew I could achieve it. But you know what stopped me? Comfort. Now after making that video, I could tell you I got like 3 jobs or 4 jobs on CCTV installation that actually gave me money that was able to sustain me up until this month of May.

And I'm not copying and I am not copying. So comfort was the killer of that goal. When I set up well, I was really broke and I saw I could achieve it if I remained in a state of mind. But because of that, because of I got money, I was like, OK, I am probably need money to run ads. I probably need money to do this and I'm not managing the money I have well. But then looking at it, it was just comfort because now I am broke again. Yes, I'm saying this on air. I am broke again, and I'm telling you that I already find the solution to that problem through my brain.

Used to work here, Jesus. I've already found the solution to that problem. So comfort is a killer of destiny, is a killer of your goal. So that is 1 irreversible knowledge I've gained from this year. Strive to be in a place that makes you uncomfortable. Strive to be in a position that makes you uncomfortable because comfort kills faster than anything. Comfort kills your growth. Comfort holds your growth. So strive to be in a place that makes you uncomfortable. So now I ask you again, what did you learn that you can never unlearn?

What has this, your year, this your current age taught you that you can never unlearn? If there is nothing, then your growth is questionable. It is really, really questionable. Question three, What are you still carrying that doesn't belong to who you are becoming? What mindset? And put it that way, what mindset are you still carrying that doesn't belong to who you're becoming? What habits, what belief, what relationship is from a version of you that you should have outgrown? Now to answer this question you have to understand something.

Who are you trying to become? If you don't know that then you have a longer to go. So now ask yourself who are you trying to become? Then you have the answer to the question, but then you can answer this full question. For me it was the mindset that failure means you have failed, that failure is a bad thing. Then put it that way, the message I had before was like, failure is a bad thing. Public failure, public disgrace, shame they all existed. But no, they don't do only exist in your own head, do only exist in your own mentality, do only exist in your own view of life.

Failure means you found a way that something would not work. Because I failed, I did not make my first one million naira online. That just means that I found a way that it would not work out for me. I found the process that would not help me make my first one million naira online. Now I can never repeat that mistake. You cannot come to me and say he said the gulu. He did not achieve it though that that will happen. You can't fit, you know. So what mindset are you still carrying that is kind of limiting you or that will not suit that person you are trying to become?

You need to answer the question. Listen, getting older is automatic. I'll say that again. Getting older is automatic. Growing is a decision. And the difference between the two is whether you are asking the five questions or you're just watching the calendar move. And I just give you what the right questions to ask tonight before you sleep. Run the audit on yourself. In fact, after listening to this podcast, go and run that audit now. Don't wait. See if you don't run that audit like you postpone it, then just rested this few think 30 minutes or so minutes of your, of your, of your time, of your life.

So run the audit. You truly want to become a better person. You want that audit. Let me tell you something. Research shows that listen attentively. Neurological research shows that the prefrontal cortex, which is the identity development center of your brain, is not fully developed until you turn around 25 years. So this means what you decide about your life in this period sets the trajectory for your life in the next decade, for the next decade. I'm going to say that again, research shows that the identity development in the 18 to 25 window, 18 to 25 years window is the most critical aspect of a person's life.

And now what you decide at this age about yourself in this period, set the trajectory of your life for decades. Once you are unsuccessful, let this window pass unconsciously. If you are planning not to be unsuccessful, then you should take this very seriously. Whatever you've learned now, go and implement it right now and know if you are not growing, what can you actually do to to ensure that you are growing and not getting older? Ask yourself the three questions. Who did you become? What did you learn that you can never online and what are you still carrying that does not belong to you anymore?

Write it down, say to yourself, think about it underneath. Don't just listen and pass. Don't just listen and scroll. Don't just listen for listening sake. Don't just listen to feel inspired. Don't just listen to feel motivated. Listen and act. Be the duer and not just the hero alone. And if this episode has landed, then share this with someone, One person at least. Now you know why you should share it. Send it to your WhatsApp status and send this to someone who needs to hear today. You just sat through this entire episode.

That means something about you. It means you're not the kind of person who just scrolls past the things that matter. You stop, you listen and you think. And that is exactly the kind of person the refined Gen. was built for. The Refined Gen. is our community, a space for people like you who are done just existing and ready to actually become. If you're not in it yet, the link is in the description. Come join us now. If you're someone who believes in what we are building here and you want to be part of it in a bigger way.

We are open. If you want to come on as a guest and have real conversations, if you want to sponsor this podcast and get your brand in front of some of the most ambitious young minds in Africa, if you want to advertise, collaborate or partner with us in any way, we want to hear from you. Reach out to us on Instagram at the Morning Gear or send us an e-mail. All the contact info is in the description. This is the Morning Gear podcast and we are just getting started. I am divine Daniel the Gen. Z, the educator.

Don't thank me, outgrow me, and then stay refined.

Field Notes